In the 90's when I was black

In the 90s when I was black. In the 90s when I was black I felt a strong sense of identity. I listened to stories of my life an those I knew though my favorite rappers lyrics. I hung out on corners with my friends. We laughed about any and everything. In the 90s when I was black we wore big logos on our t-shrits and gave each other pounds. I am still black only that it seems to be most associated with disadvantages. I don't dress like myself anymore. When I was black I wore hoodies all the time it was my staple. But some would like to say I/we are living in post-black times. But I refuse to not be black. For I am certainly not white or asian. What are the distinctive traits of my culture. I refuse to lose them so I force myself to listen to a music that is so distanced from me but happens to be as good as it gets for now. I hold on to mac and cheese and go to the corner store just to remember that feeling of being black. I went to an Al Sharpton march that I knew would change anything, because I wanted to feel black. As black as I felt when I saw the million man march, or the girls with big hoop earrings, and that friendly pound for the kids on the block. The pounds that has sadly weakened in to a hand shake. And us girls who sadly dress like white girl trying to finally assimilate in to main stream culture. We have so much more to lose than gain. I badly have the urge to be black again.